Saturday, December 29, 2012

A Life In The Day Of Jonathan Billet


A Life In The Day Of Jonathan Billet


I think I chipped my tooth again eating meat with tiny bones in it.  It was sold to me at that cheap deli run by that schmuck.  Emergency!!!  Time for a trip to the dentist!!  Oh my God!!  The first time it happened, I was a mere child running in the halls at school and fell down on the hard tile floor, unlike the rest of the kids.  My girlfriend in high school had a chipped tooth too.  The cause was one of those hidden mysteries in my life.  Like my father's chipped tooth.
Is a billion, a thousand - million or a million - million?  Does Kennedy have a billion tucked away?  He had a bad throat, which makes it sound like he has a speech impediment like my grammatical impediment.  I'm sure he's good at grammatical structure.  The Kennedys were always in bad shape almost as bad as the shape of my life. 

Diagnosed with schizophrenia in college and symptomatic of the disease ever since than.  From the age of 21 to the current age of 59.  Full of phinothiozenes from age 21 - 58 .  From age 38 - 59 loaded on psychotropics. With the help of a psychiatric family - community included - I was never physically violent.  I did suffer from temper tantrums as a child and suffered from fear, anger and depression as an adult.  However, I wasn't truly psychotic until the age of 21 and was medicated immediately.  I hear a lot about violence but was mugged at around the age of 50.  Face beaten in, eyes blackened, and ribcage broken.  Heck, I was lucky I was jumped from behind by three bigger guys and didn't have the ability to struggle as they punched away.  Lucky, I think, because if I could have fought back they might have knifed or shot me.  Lucky too because I peed in my pants scaring them away without getting their fingers wet stealing my wallet

I enjoyed my more sane days and would be the first to admit I had them.  While I was considered a basket case by myself and others, I managed to work at a department store, and two libraries for about 13 years.  I graduated college - three colleges, the last successfully.  More than can be said of the rest of our society.   I like writing as a hobby and enjoyed being published recently for my poetry in a couple of publications.  I hope to publish a collection of my poetry.
Remember, that as I wrote in one of my many earlier poems - "Life is sublime when it changes from a riddle into a rhyme!"  Please read my thoughts.  I think a lot about life and have high hopes for myself and the world.  The world is so confused to me that I could swim from China to New York in my laughter's tears!

Work is for the weary.  The work place is full of the good stinkers and the bad stinkers.  I wouldn't trust any of their judgments, especially my own.  But I forgot I am not considered a worker by these stinkers.  All I do is write trash about them and than collect cash for throwing out their trash.  Like some people do, I find my trash very valuable.  I would have to say that in reality I'm a very bad good stinker. 
               
True judgment deals with justice.  There is legal justice and poetic justice.  Most established societies of the world deal in legal or civil justice regardless of their political, philosophical, religious, but not necessarily their moral codes.  Moral codes intertwine with poetic judgment.  But really who's to say?  Certainly not a very good bad stinker as myself!!!  The world considers me to be crazy - what about it?  Mashuganah!!!

Love You - A Day Away From Christmas - Jonathan Billet

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